my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I just sucked dick on a ferry
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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