shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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