woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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