i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
