Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
