he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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