my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
