I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize