yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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