omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
