Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
