Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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