The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
