I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
