Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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