it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I did not marry a roomba.
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