u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
