who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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