Is it because I queefed?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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