I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
