he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize