Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
