I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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