I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Randomize
