what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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