Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
