I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
