Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
