No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
