trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
