And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize