I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
