We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
