i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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