why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
