I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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