worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
