similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize