Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
