I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize
