Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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