Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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