Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
high people should be assigned attendants
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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