I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Randomize
