Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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