I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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