Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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