he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
did i walk over a car last night?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
