He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
