I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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