your thong is hanging out like whoa
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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