Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
